The Sweet Christian Bride

10 Considerations for Choosing a Bridal Party: #9

by admin on January 8, 2013 in Bridal Party with No Comments

Consideration #9: How many guests do you have?

As a rule of thumb, your bridal party should reflect a fair percentage of your guests. It’s odd to have seven bridesmaids when you only have 50 guests. Those girls (and the corresponding groomsmen) would be looming over the tiny crowd. Likewise, it seems more appropriate to have four to seven bridesmaids for a 200+ wedding than simply having one.

Usually, the bigger the wedding, the bigger your bridal party is “allowed” to be. The smaller the wedding, the smaller your bridal party is “allowed” to be. It looks more appropriate, and it keeps people from feeling like they don’t matter to you.

The truth is, they do matter to you if they are invited to your wedding, but if you have a high enough ratio of bridal party to guests, this truth can be missed; your guests can feel like they are the leftovers rather than like your bridal party is the honored few.

People can handle the fact that they aren’t in the “chosen” crowd if they look left and right and see that most others aren’t either.

Again, this is just a rule of thumb. How your bridal party looks in comparison to the size of your guests and how your guests feel about not being in your bridal party are considerations that come second to whom God has led you to choose as your bridal party.

My friends, for example, had a bridal army! A massive group of their friends walked down the aisle and clustered up front by the bride and groom. The bride and groom found it more important to honor those people in their lives whom God led them to honor than to have a traditionally numbered bridal party.

The guys’ side looked a little funny because there was a solid black wall of tuxedos up there, but the girls were wearing a medley of yellows, golds, pinks, and oranges. They looked like a lively spring field of wild flowers.

The wedding was so moving and beautiful, and the bride and groom were such relational people, that it seemed right for them to have 12-14 people at each of their sides.

Whether you and your fiancé decide on one person each or fourteen, you get to make this call together with guidance from the Lord. The rule of thumb is simply to consider a common perspective of guests. Just like with my friends, the number you choose will likely be the best number possible for your wedding because your decision will be made with a rationale consistent with your personalities.

The best weddings are those that reflect the personalities of the bride and groom, even at the cost of tradition!

Photo © ToddKuhns –

Article was originally published on January 31, 2011.

By Lindsay

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